Mall Santa

Friday afternoon we took the kids to the mall so Tai could pick out an ornament to buy for the tree. This seems to have become an annual tradition, if doing something twice makes it a "tradition".

Anyway, we were walking through the mall and came across a sad Mall Santa and his elf, sitting all alone with no children anywhere in sight. Obviously anxious for something to do, he vehemently waved Tai over. Naturally, Tai went into shy mode and was almost too scared to even walk past. But when Santa waved a free coloring book around, Tai was convinced to step just a little closer (leaving a good three feet between him and Santa) and reach out and grab the book.

Then, of course, Santa popped the question: "What would you like for Christmas? Popular Option A, Popular Option B, or Popular Option C?"

Are you kidding me? A multiple choice Santa? Talk about a leading interview question. Is it always this way? Having *never* sat on a Santa lap myself and having a child who has also never done it, I'm not sure if this is how it normally goes, but it sure seems lame to me. I was expecting him to mumble under his breath, "Available at Target, Aisle 17, for $29.99." I mean, really, who is paying him to lay out options for these kids?**

I indicated to Santa that we had already sent him a (purposely vague) letter and that he should look for that in the mail. But it was too late. My son had already responded with "Option A." Coincidentally, he will be receiving Option A from his grandparents. Knowing him, he'll remember this interaction and I'll have to field questions Christmas morning about how and why Santa contacted his grandparents and told them that Tai wanted Option A. Ugh.

**And don't even get me started on the fact that the options he laid out were totally gendered. Oh how I wish Tai had said, "Actually, I want more pink Hello Kitty socks." And I'm just glad Quynh is still too young for Mall Santas to ask her if she wants (a) a Barbie or (b) a Bratz Doll.

I Don't Have it in me to Construct Paragraphs

So you get a bulleted list today:

• After wrapping five of them, I now know exactly what size piece of wrapping paper is perfect for wrapping a Zhu Zhu Pet.
• I am delighted to report that my husband took my son to the ballet today. They are such Modern Men.
• Tomorrow is Minh's birthday. And we've gotten to the point in our lives where his gift consists of: (a) sleeping as late as he wants, (b) dinner from Pizza Hut, and possibly (c) a home-made card from Tai, if he's amenable to an art project tomorrow morning.
• Swim class continues to go well, despite Tai's insistence each week that I inform his teacher that he's "only going to put my feet in today" or "going to hang on to the wall the whole time". By this point in the game, the teacher just says OK and rolls her eyes because we all know he's going to get in and swim like a fishy.
• Quynh is waking from nap. I must go snuggle her till the boys get home.

Mixing Worlds

This year, because Tai's birthday party will not be held at home, we've felt free to expand the guest list quite a bit. Instead of four kids, we are expecting between seven and ten. We've invited his "usual" gang of school friends, but also some out-of-school friends, as well as two cousins and four grandparents.

This should be interesting.

Actually, I think it could be great. The guests are all people Tai loves and it might be wonderful for them to all meet each other. Or it could overwhelm him and cause a meltdown. Or he could devote all his time and attention to a couple kids and ignore the rest. When they are 4, there's just no predicting. Needless to say, I spent the last several days agonizing over the location, date, time, and guest list. And this year it was supposed to be easy--since we won't have to host it at home.

Anyway, it's officially booked and the invites are sent. Now I can take a deep breath and all I have to do is spend the next few weeks agonizing over cake, snacks, and party favors. Ugh.

In Case You Get Lost....

...ours is the house with the six-foot-tall sparkling inflatable snow globe in the middle of the front lawn.





Oh yes, our mischievous neighbor has outdone his own past hijinx with this stunt. I foolishly mentioned to this man that my kids love all the tacky decorations in the stores this time of year and then immediately saw a naughty twinkle in his eye.

Two days later Minh went to take the dog out for "last call" and found this, still in the box, in our driveway. Even though it was late, and cold, and dark, and I was tired, I immediately started hatching a plan to go set it up on his front lawn. We got as far as opening the box and reading the directions before deciding that anything with an air pump, and stakes, and tethers needs to be set up in the light of day.

So what could we do but set it up on our own lawn the next day? And, of course, the look of sheer joy on both kids' faces was priceless when it first inflated. Tai loves the way the lights shimmer at night and Quynh calls it "pop up!" and keeps asking to touch it.

Alas, I fear this item has now joined the annual decorations for our household, for years to come. If our neighbor keeps this up, we'll soon be able to start charging people to drive by and gawk at our holiday decor.

I've promised our neighbor that there will be retaliation, I just don't know what, or when.

Quantifying My Life

18 - number of months since Quynh was born (how did that happen?)

25 - number of pounds Quynh weighs

2 - number of turkey dinners we attended last Thursday

3 - number of servings of cranberry sauce Quynh ate

0 - number of bites of turkey Quynh ate

101.8 - fever both kids came down with last weekend

6 - number of hours of television Tai watched while sick

5 - number of new words Quynh seems to learn each day

3 - number of words she can string together ("more please, daddy!")

1 - number of days it took me to read this month's Book Club book

3 - number of people who will be attending Book Club this month

15 - number of online scrabble games I've played recently

1 - number of online scrabble games I've won -- I need dumber friends

47 - number of months since Tai was born (I really need to start planning his birthday party.)

6 - number of social events planned for December, thus far

0 - number of Christmas gifts I've bought so far

1 - number of personal days I'll have to take off work to get Christmas shopping done without kids in tow